Sometimes You Don't Have a Choice

I've been writing a supernatural series for a couple of years now.  The BFF has read it and loves it.  Sis has read it and loves it.  Me?  Well, I love it too, these are my babies, but the editing process is slow because I'm too close to it.  I'm too close to it and can't edit it properly but there is no way it's ready to be submitted, maybe accepted, and have a professional editor do his or her job.  Slowly and surely, I am getting it to that place.

But sometimes, the voices talking in my head are different.  They don't belong in the world that I've already created.  So I let them talk and I listened, but I didn't put the words on the page.  Until yesterday.  Yesterday, finally, I was able to have a jumping off point and the voices are so damn relieved they've been talking incessantly ever since.  I love these new guys and I'm happy that they are getting their story told.  Again, it may not go anywhere.  It may not get to the point where it sees the light of day.  But I have some beta readers lined up and we shall see.

Of course, I feel guilty.  I feel like I'm abandoning the world I so lovingly crafted for a new and shiny toy.  And then a strange and wonderful thought occurred to me.  When I'm making a craft project, when I choose to knit, that does not mean I am abandoning my first love which is crocheting.  When I put down a project to work on something else (because it has a deadline or it's interesting or whatever) that does not mean I'm abandoning it forever.  Just that that project and I need a little break so that I can go back to it later with a fresh eye and a happy heart.  So that there can be the joyous reunion of "dear god, I have missed you!" and "I'm so glad you're back!"  I live for those moments.  

Of course, sometimes I don't have a choice.  With yarn or with writing, I have to go where my muse takes me.  Because the fact of the matter is, it will always take me back again.